I unfortunately know too much as well. When I finally found out about his cheating while we were engaged he just screamed it all out at me. Told me about how she had a larger chest and bigger butt than normal. Then the jerk told me how when she touched him he "immediately" became aroused!! Why would he tell me that? Why? Jerk. I also know which position. Partly because that way he didn't have to take responsibility because she climbed on top of him you see. He was the innocent party I guess. He also claimed that his hands stayed at his side the entire time. Yep!! He said it.
So when and if we are together I see her. I feel less than adequate if I do decide to touch him and he doesn't respond right away. In fact it usually will end right there if that happens. Because if she can get you started with one touch than why can't I. I must not be good enough.
I also know what he searched for mostly on porn. Those are now off the table. Completely off the table. He has mentioned that he misses it. Sorry dude. You are the one who had to have more. Who didn't feel as if I was enough. You had it all, and then wanted more. So now, you get none of it. I am not going to put myself in that position anymore.
They just don't realize how traumatizing this all is. They have no true clue. I go back and forth with wanting him and wanting to vomit. Right now I am in the vomiting stage.
Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.